Kids First: What Kids Want Grown-Ups to Know about Separation & Divorce
by Kids First Center
See more about this book on BarnesandNoble.com

This divorce book is not about legal strategies or who gets the 401K; it's about divorcing in a better way with the kids in mind. Based upon actual input from hundreds of kids that have lived through the fallout of divorce themselves, this eye opening book explains effective and less hurtful ways to deal with separation, co-parenting, holidays and celebrations, new relationships, and much more. If anyone you know is dealing with divorce or separation and has children, this book can help them more effectively deal with a tremendously difficult time in their lives. Makes a great gift from a caring family member or friend.

Helping Your Kids Cope with Divorce the Sandcastles Way
M. Gary Neuman, LMHC
Author
See more about this book on Amazon.com

This warm, empathetic guide shows you:

• How to build a co-parenting relationship - even when you think you can't
• When you or your child should see a therapist
• Age-appropriate scripts for addressing sensitive issues
• What to do when a parent moves away
• How to stop fighting with your ex-spouse
• How to navigate the emotional turmoil of custody and visitation
• How to help your child deal with change
• How to cope with kids' common fears about separation
• How to introduce significant others into the family and help your child cope with a new stepfamily
  

There is nothing easy about the breakup of a marriage, from coping with loss and failure to dealing with the uncertainly of the future. Abigail Trafford charts this emotional journey, identifying the common phases in the evolution from marriage to separation to divorce, and eventually to a new life. Based upon her personal experience, extensive research, and interviews with hundreds of divorced men and women. Trafford offers individuals a better understanding of their own experiences and the message that they are not alone in their pain and confusion. Crazy Time is also an investment in the future – Trafford reveals the telltale signs of a marriage in crisis, and discusses what determines whether a relationship will survive over time.

For Better or For Worse presents a radically new story about the nature and consequences of divorce in America today. Debunking popular wisdom on the devastating psychological and social effects of divorce, this new story replaces the fiction with the facts derived from eminent psychologist E. Mavis Hetherington’s landmark study. After nearly three decades of research involving 1400 families, Hetherington puts forth a more nuanced picture of marital breakup – not as a momentary event but as a life process that has a continuing influence throughout the stages of divorce, single parenthood, remarriage, and stepfamily life; and in diverse interpersonal contexts: with partners, children, stepchildren, and eventually in the adult relationships of the children themselves, For Better or For Worse offers readers an important first step in recognizing the obstacles they are likely to encounter and the choices they must make, so that the pathway out of divorce need not be one of dissolution but one of healing and ultimate fulfillment.

If you grew up as a child of divorce, you may find yourself asking: Why am I so afraid of conflict? Why do I have such a fear of commitment? Why am I always waiting for the “other shoe to drop,” even at moments of success? You may be surprised to discover how common these feelings are for children of divorce, especially as they get older. Dr. Judith Wallerstein has been studying the effects of divorce on children for 25 years, but even she wasn’t expecting the findings presented here: that while children learn to cope with divorce, its greatest effects don’t emerge until adulthood.

What About the Kids? Raising Your Children Before, During, and After Divorce
Judith S. Wallerstein, Sandra Blakeslee
Authors
See more about this book on Amazon.com

How can you genuinely protect your children during and after divorce? Renowned child psychologist Judith Wallerstin has spent most of her career studying children and divorce, and she answers this important question based on thirty years of in-depth interviews with children of divorce and their parents. With sections devoted to various ages of children and their particular issues, you’ll find out:

• How to prepare your children for the breakup before it happens
• The worst time to divorce
• How to be co-parents outside of marriage
• How to carry on the conversation about divorce through the years
• How to choose the best custody for your children

And much more, as well as valuable information about being a terrific single parent, approaching remarriage, and healthy step-parenting.

Divorce is never easy. On the contrary, it is one of the most difficult experiences that anyone will ever be faced with in his or her life. It will test them as few things ever have or ever will. Nevertheless, it does not have to become the nightmare that so many husbands and wives unwittingly make of it. It is possible to get through it and still keep one’s life intact. The Two Roads to Divorce shows how that is possible. It provides the insight, understanding and wisdom, born of years of experience, that has enabled countless numbers of divorcing couples to do that. Its purpose is to inspire others to believe that they can as well.

What determines whether step-families remain together? What helps stepfamilies overcome the difficulties of remarriage and become mutually supportive family units? How can mental health professionals better support this development? This book brings both clarity and depth to the unique and complex dynamics of remarried families, drawing on interviews with over one hundred stepfamily members, up-to-date research, a solid theoretical framework, and an empathic clinical sensibility to present an insightful model of stepfamily development, the Stepfamily Cycle.

This extraordinary guide has already helped over 75,000 families confront the tough challenges that blended family life presents. Now revised and expanded, it offers even more in-depth discussions of all the vital questions that arise during the adjustment process – from premarriage to remarriage - including:

• How do you handle a child’s anger over your decision to remarry?
• How do you integrate both sets of relatives into your wedding ceremony?
• How do you cope with disciplining older stepchildren?
• How do your ex-spouse’s parents fit into the grandparenting picture?
• How do you and your new spouse negotiate differences in child rearing philosophy?
• How do you avoid playing favorites with your biological children?
  

Tips and strategies on dealing with the issues remarried couples face, with a wealth of advice from real-life stepcouples, such as:

• Learning to tailor your expectations of your spouse or children and remembering that no family is perfect
• Knowing where your boundaries are, whether involving a hostile ex-spouse or a stepchild who demands too much attention
• Realizing that traits like flexibility, tolerance, forgiveness, and openness are especially essential in a stepfamily situation
• Making “us” time for talking, problem-solving, weekends away, and enjoying your marriage to constantly renew and strengthen your bond as a couple